| LearnJazzPiano.com archives: Jazz Widow | |
| 7 -- 03/01/2004, 12:06:17 -- #1969 | |
| Dear Auntie, My fiancé does nothing but play Jazz piano all day and all night. He says he's playing "Monk", but it sounds more like a drunk monkey bashing away at the keys. I finally got sick of it and told him that he has to choose either me or the music. After all, he'll never make any money playing that weird crap. We're going to need lots for a down payment on my dream house, and lord knows that our children are going to be expensive. When he said "goodbye" I don't think he really meant it. But then he went back to playing and didn't talk to me anymore. Should I leave him? Or should I stay and try to mold him into my adolescent fantasy of the man of my dreams? Jazz Widow | |
| 7 -- 03/01/2004, 12:07:46 -- #1970 | |
| Dearest Widow, Do you know what the difference is between a Jazz musician and a large pepperoni pizza? A large pepperoni pizza can feed a family of four! You make me sick. For all you know, your fiancé might turn out to be the greatest musical genius if the 21st century and here you want to beat him down into some little milquetoast money machine. There is a place for you in hell. Anyone who would try to turn the soul of a sensitive artist into some pussy-whipped cowering dog is worse than any slave-driver or sadistic control freak. The fact that you even believe that you can bulldoze your way through life with ultimatums of this kind is proof of what a sick and selfish individual you are. I was originally going to recommend that you click on the "e-harmony" dating service link on this site and take their boring 45-minute "test" to see if there were any males on this planet masochistic enough to submit to your psycho-torture. But on second thought I wouldn't wish your particular brand of neuroses on any man on earth. Unless you change your attitude immediately concerning the validity of the arts and culture, and try to understand your fiancé's needs to fulfill his own destiny you will certainly die alone, unloved and penniless. Your fiancé ought to take you to an ice-rink balcony and explain the true meaning of life to you. Auntie | |
| marksdg -- 03/04/2004, 12:16:04 -- #2096 | |
| Jazz Widow, Leave him. Do not do the thing that so many women do of thinking they can mold their man to do what they want. If he doesn't make any money, and you don't like his music, this is not a relationship that can work. To be married to a struggling musician you need to probably have a decent job yourself, love his music, and not be jealous about his time. You have to accept that he might or might not make it big, but he is much more likely to make it big if he has your support. I can't imagine a musician wanting to be married to someone who hates their music. | |
| ClosetBlues -- 03/05/2004, 09:52:49 -- #2136 | |
| Thanks for the considerate advice, Auntie. You're right about my attitude and I don't want to end up in hell for it. He must be a total genius. My friend's sister's piano jazz instuctor (that she's sleeping with for a grade because her playing sucks but she like big pianists) told my friend that Monk was a genius. His playing only sounded odd because it was in a "code" which can be deciphered using a complex harmonic algorithm to convert the sounds into understandable music. So I used some plyers and an old guitar tuner from my neighbor to re-tune my fiance's piano. My friend's sister's piano instructor said to raise each black note by a half-step and lower the white notes 3/4 of a step so that when playing Monk it comes out sounding right. I'm soooo excited! I called my fiance and asked him to come home tonight and play Monk all night. I put roses on his piano and have tulips for his organ. Thanks! Jazz Widow PS. A large peperoni only feeds two around here. | |
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