heh heh - were you a lead player:)...

True story. I was talking to Bob Florence at the jazz camp the other day and somehow it came up that I used to be a lead trumpet player. He said, "So...

Definition of a Gentleman; some one who knows how to play the accordion , but doesnt.

A jazz musician hits the lottery for 5 million bucks and his buddys ask him what he is gonna do ? so he says I guess Ill keep gigging till the money runs ...

(I heard this joke in German last night at a gig, so I decided to translate it with a change or two to fit)... A piano player had a bad headache...

Before criticizing or judging someone, it's important to walk a mile in their shoes first because then you'll be a mile away, have their shoes, and you can...

In case anyone needs an artificial limb and has the money not; "Hell far (fire), jus' sneak in a fashion shop late at night, findja' the ri...

I felt sorry for myself when I had not shoes...until I met a man who had no feet...so I walked up to the man and said, "Hey Buddy, ya got any shoes...

I met a man with one leg and from me he did beg, "Hey you fool, bring me a stool" But instead I gave him a peg!...

An extremely frightened & worried skeleton is really "making tracks" towards the viewer at whatever angle, because: ..................He's...

Close-up of Apple on someone's head, by tree, with an arrow stuck in it. An angry worm is part-way out scolding: .........................."You son...

What did the corpse say to the already attending "people" at the deadman's shin dig as it climbed out of its grave rather late in front of every ...

What did the American hooker say at the Oktoberfest in Germany? .........................."This butt's for you!"...

A guy walks into the doctor's office with green beans in his nose and carrots in his ears. He say's "Doc, I'm jut not feeling well" The Doc s...

A centipede couple are in bed, missionary position, sort of under the sheets. She's got the big eyelashes on, etc. The caption reads....................

What did the corpse say to the already attending crowd at the deadman's shindig as it climbed out of its grave rather late in front of everybody? ......

There's a tombstone with a "thought cloud" coming out from the deceased. What is he/she/(it?) thinking?... "I'm so bored!"--...

Good one Kai! OK, at a bar Einstein is the bartender, and he has a "cartoon idea lightbulb" shining over his head. Then 3 notes with those cone-s...

:)...

Three musicians and a drummer walk into a bar...